Thursday, April 19, 2007

Even in our grief, we have to find some laughter....

A true story told to me by my dear friend, a WVU mom, about her grandson, also a rabid Mountaineer supporter:

A 13 year old middle schooler had been closely watching the news about Virginia Tech. The first time he met up with his grandmother after the shootings, he was noticeably concerned and thoughtful. After they agreed it was a terrible tragedy, the boy looked squarely in his grandma's eyes and made a solemn promise:

"I tell you what, Grandma, I'll never flick off a Hokie again!"

Monday, April 16, 2007

Prayers to our university community...

Some of you might remember my daughter is a Hokie. She is safe, thank God, but the pain and terror remains. One friend is dead and another struggles for life.

The Hokie Nation is gasping in horror and clinging tightly to each other. This poem was posted on a VaTech sports website by a UVA grad. We stand together in the wake of senseless violence.


Wind sweeps through the mountains,
Wiping away the innocence,
Tears stream like rivers,
Oh what senseless violence!

A nations heart is broken,
Youthful lifes hardly begun,
So many yet to have spread their wings,
So early to have stopped their run.

An act of utter cowardice,
A sensless attempt to hurt,
So many lives this has affected,
Optimism and hope left inert.

Today we are all Hokies,
No matter where we are from,
Though on the field we may be enemies,
Today we hold Virginia as our Home.

God Bless.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Thanks for the "birthday" wishes...

At EBDBLOG, one of the sites I check daily, they have noted my second year anniversary as a blogger.

Feels like it was just yesterday when I impulsively pushed the Blogger button and began to figure out how the blog thingee worked. I always knew I had something to say, it was just a matter of deciding that THIS was the right forum. Even as I get distracted and blog a bit inconsistently, I always come back.

As ever,thanks for reading my blog.

Monday, March 19, 2007

And now, for your protection.....

Our school is scheduled for a LOCK DOWN drill this week, an activity whereby we two teachers lock our classroom door, turn off the lights, whisk our class of highly reactive, emotionally impaired six year olds to a corner of our room where we are meant to sit in absolute silence for 10 to 15 minutes... and if we don't, a team of security specialists acting as school intruders will detect our whereabouts....

It's a nightmare.

Our administrators have worked hard to get the security folks to understand the sensitive nature of our ED kids and the many other special needs kids in our building.

I'm told they agree not to bang loudly on our doors to provoke the kids into breaking the rules and screaming.

I can't wait til this is over....

Saturday, March 10, 2007

Begging for attention and anything else that's needed..

This lazy Saturday morning, my sweet dog, Cayenne, is repeatedly bumping her nose into my hand, asking for.. no demanding.. what it is she needs. She won't give up until I pet her head and rub her belly.

You have to respect this kind of unabashed neediness. If we all were as honest about what would make us happy, the world would be a less complicated place, that's for sure.

I'm thinking about my students' behaviors over the years, and how tough it's been to wade through all the distractors to get to the real issue: "How will you meet my needs, Mrs. Ris?"

For many of my kids, it's a matter of providing immediate basic needs. Here's a juice box and breakfast bar to get you through the morning. You were up late because of your family's partying and fighting? Take a little nap in the bean bag and I'll catch you up on your lessons later. Need a clean t-shirt? Let's check the extra clothes bag.

Sometimes we can't even begin to give kids what they crave. In a six hour day I can't hug a kid enough to make a difference... although we all try. We can't makeup for a home life of humiliation and threats. And when a child's brain chemistry is off, all we can do is be as structured and consistent as possible, and pray the meds will work.

We plan our lessons with attention and detail; we overplan and, as necessary, change up our plans on the fly to meet new roadblocks. It's complicated and draining to be so focused on doing what is right.

So this morning, when Cayenne looks so lovingly my way and keeps nuzzling my hand, I'll thank goodness for her uncomplicated, honest "begging". It feels good to satisfy her needs so easily.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Hard work...

His is learned helplessness of the most debilitating kind...

He hims and haws, shakes his head, throws over his chair, and pleads loudly.

"I can't do it! I don't know it. I can't!"

If you just came upon us as I worked with him on his phonics lesson, you'd think I was a real witch of a teacher. I ignore his tears, demand more of him, make him start over when he balks.

I question myself as I push, push, push. I feel so evil. I want to hold him in my lap and assure him that everything is okay. Gently wipe away his tears. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

Somehow, I keep pushing. I can feel it deep down that this is the right thing to do after all these months of carefully moving him down the path to learning.

Do it again, Mike.
Try it again.
No, start over.
Look again.

He takes a bathroom break, and so do I. As I walk out into the hall, another teacher and her student are reading together. The teacher, new to our school, looks at me differently. I feel judged.

Mike takes his seat again. I put the word and sound cards out again. He starts, fumbles just a bit, then starts again. He does it.

I am too exhausted to rejoice. For now, we smile at each other, and breathe.

Update

Tuesday morning, I put Mike's phonics cards out for him to do. He said something alittle whiney, then sighed and instantly put them in order. Task done. Lesson learned. For both of us.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Bring em on!


6 days off-- thanks to the ice and snow storm-- and I feel rested, rejuevenated, and ready for tomorrow.

I am really looking forward to seeing my kiddos, and I am excited about getting back to my lessons. Really excited!

I think this is anectdotal evidence that I would do well on a year round schedule where periodic breaks come in small doses throughout the year.

Until tomorrow.....

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Update: The Kindergarten Lincolnphiles

According to kinder teacher Kathy, her students seemed to "know" alot about Honest Abe even before they started the unit. With a smile on her face and a light in her heart she reports:

- "Lincoln was George Washington's brother.
- He saw slaves and had a dream. (Do we get credit for making a connection?)
- He died when he went to the movies."

Again, these are the moments that keep us coming back, right?

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

"Father Abraham"

I use discussion of Abraham Lincoln's life as a springboard for comparing the past with the present. It's almost a universal truth these last 18 years...kids like learning about our 16th president. His story resonates with kids, rich and poor, black and white, tall and short,etc. His likeable geekiness shines through all of the children's biographies I read to my classes. In one activity today, we compared elements of Abe's life with our own, including the famous one room log house, his non-traditional family (stepmother and stepsiblings), his tendency to sneak away from his chores to read, and the hard, physical labor he did to help his family (chop down trees, plow the fields, etc.).

When they see his likeness on the penny and the five dollar bill, they really understand his historical importance!! A few years ago, one of my boys said "What money has George Bush on it? THAT'S how you know he's a big deal."

Attention, Karl Rove....

Lastly, one of my big hearted boys today swore that if he lived in Lincoln's time, he would have been a bodyguard to protect Abe from the bad guy.

You have to love 'em.

Friday, February 09, 2007

The Parent Connection.....

It's inevitable; "teacher talk" will turn to parent responsibility and participation, and how too much or too little affects the quality of our teaching lives. Studies reveal the value of positive parental participation, especially with regard to student achievement. However, we all know that when parents come to us with distrust and a dislike for school as an institution, our communications are generally unpleasant. Such unpleasantness can be burdonsome.... and goodness knows we teachers don't need anything to make our job harder.

So with this in mind, I share the following:

1. I invite parents to class and school functions with genuine hopefulness and an open heart.

2. I send reminders because I know it’s so easy to forget. I’m a parent, too, so I know how kooky schedules can be.

3. I phone, leave messages, email and otherwise keep open the lines of communication.

4. I try not to call only for the negative stuff.

HOWEVER....
5. I do not hold my breath when parents are meant to call back, send papers back, email back or otherwise respond to communication from the school.

6. I never hold kids accountable for their parents lack of participation in school functions. I try, as much as possible, never to say anything about their folks not participating. This can be a very humiliating thing for kids. They know when their parents can’t or won’t make connections with school. No need to give the kids a reason to build defensiveness. After all, the real relationship that needs to be maintained is that between me and the child.


Not only does this save face with the child, it saves time, AND prevents a lot of hand wringing and useless declarations about the sad state of parenthood in this country!

Over the years, I have learned the importance of focusing on what it is I CAN control. I control my decision to continue to keep open the door to my kids’ parents. I hope for the best, but prepare for non-participation. That’s my reality, and to accept it leaves me the energy to really work with my students. Them, I have for 6 hours a day. I choose to concentrate on that.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

The Point of No Return

At about 10:00 this morning, on a day when 3 of my bi-polar students are cycling, when the little boy who has been such a terrible challenge these last months is banging doors and tearing up the timer and throwing legos at the windows, at this very point in time, the crisis counselor leaves for a meeting.

The crisis room is closed. For a full hour in our day, that critical support is unavailable.

Thus began a succession of mini tantrums escalating to large-scale crises, and we are a full staff member short, and even if we were fully staffed at that moment, it wouldn't have been enough, because these kids are in a spiral, feeding off each other, and their insatiable need for stimulation and attention goes unchecked and untethered.

To be fair, the purpose of the meeting was very important and child-oriented. Clearly, the folks involved needed to meet.

My gripe is the decision to make convenient their meeting time at the expense of what the other children and staff need.

Striking the kind of balance needed in the management of a school like ours is very, very difficult.

And today was way more difficult than it had to be. For me, my intern, and our kids.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

That's Entertainment

Poor little guy.

Without his ADHD meds, he was absolutely, unequivocally, unable to settle his brain on any single thought. He struggled to comply with routine directions; he genuinely apologized when redirected. He talked to himself and rolled across the floor and ate voraciously.

He giggled at his own jokes and growled at children who were bugging him.

Imagine having to concentrate on word families, number lines, or retelling strategies with so little control over your own thinking....

Today, we kept marveling at how cute he was. We shook our head and tried to imagine how this kid even got through a day in a full-sized, general ed classroom.

If he shows up tomorrow like this, ummm, it won't seem so cute.

Friday, January 26, 2007

The beginning of the end of a challenging era...

The meetings have been held, the options presented and discussed, and now it's in the works.

My biggest challenge, my kid in the eye of the storm, is going to be heading off to "contract services". His parents start visiting/interviewing privated schools next week.

I accept this change with a mix of emotions: some relief, yes.... a feeling of hope for this family who will probably get more support services once the change is made.... and a wave of sadness. Saying goodbye is going to be hard. He loves us, and loves our school. In the long run, a change is going to be very, very positive. In the here and now, we are in for some heartwrenching moments.

Whenever teaching is presented as a science, a skillset focusing on content area expertise, lesson development and effective assessment, I will always remember this little guy and the piece of my heart he took with him.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

To each his/her own.....

Next week the first grade teaching team will review together the most recent data from our state testing scores. We are charged with the mission to look carefully at "teaching" weaknesses with an eye toward improving our teaching practice to increase achievement.

Translation: use the information we have, as muddy as it is, to decide where we need to make changes.

This kind of collegial,achievement-oriented work always pumps me up. I look forward to our eagle-eye exploration of how we are teaching certain important objectives, and how we can do it better.

There is something about a group of caring, smart, talented teachers thoughtfully examining our kids' work and discussing how we can do better. In addition, we are reminded by our administrators to go back to info on research-based instructional strategies as we make our plans for improvement. I agree. It will be important to our success and the success of our students that we stick to proven methods, not just ideas that sound good.

It's going to be fun!
I know. I'm a geek.

Friday, January 19, 2007

The glass IS half full...

Today I looked past the snotty nose to the sweet smile.
I counted the times he followed through with a direction instead of how many times he yelled NO!
He clocked a kid, but it didn't leave a mark.
The morning went slowly, but my husband (SURPRISE!) stopped in at noon and made my day!



It's true, this looking on the bright side stuff has its benefits!!

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Making a positive change...

What's it mean when I pass my teaching colleagues in the hall and as our eyes meet, we seem to concurrently sigh, widen our eyes, and look stricken?

This seems to be happening more and more. It's only mid-January. How is it we're all so spent already? We had Monday off for God's sake.

My pledge... greet my colleagues with an air of positive expectation. I'll "ACT as if"... and the rest will come, right?

A Reasonable Compromise...

An update on the last post: The team of teachers, along with the reading teacher, decided to continue to provide extra reading support for the lowest scoring kids who are not receiving other services. In March or April, the focus will shift to those "Bubble Kids" who are just ready to bloom and need alittle extra push....

Seems like a reasonable solution to me. Bravo ladies.

Can I whine again about our desire to have the time and staffing to really provide the critical extra help for all the kids who need it?

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

We want to do the right thing.....

We meet as a first grade teaching team each Tuesday afternoon. I'm sitting here with 5 gen ed teachers, some of the most dedicated and delightful women I know. Mostly, I enjoy their collaborative attitude.

We discussed creating special reading groups to support kids who are really struggling. The question came up: should we focus this additonal help on kids who are very very low, who just aren't making it, BUT they have very little chance of improving enough to pass the state mandated testing.... OR... do we provide a boost to the kids "On The Bubble", those who, with this extra help, have a fair chance to improve and pass the tests. Not a comfortable question, but one that must be faced in this age of high stakes assessment.

We decided not to decide right now. Not a surprise, considering how it feels to make these decisions.

We really want to do the right thing.Too bad the MOST right thing is not an option considering staffing and time constraints are fixed.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Tapped out....

It's two and a half hours after the official end of the work day, and I am hurrying to my car. The after school parent meeting went long, and I am leaving a good amount of work undone on my desk. I'll get in early tomorrow to catch up before the kids get in.

As I make my way through the maze of parked cars.....there are so many of them still here!.... I run into 5 fellow teachers. Two appear to be chit-chatting,(best to do that now;there is no time during the day), and the others are moving to their cars with distinct determination. Our area is known for its horrible traffic, and our late entry onto the beltway means certain frustration. Hurry, we are late for our homelife.

The circle of life continues....

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

A New Year's Pledge....

When a child has the best day ever, when he or she sparkles and cooperates and is happy to do so..... that's the setting for a night of deep thinking, just as if it was the day from hell. What was different about the day? What did I do differently? What about home was different?

HOW CAN WE REPLICATE THIS DAY?

Because, I really want to replicate this day.

Was I more patient than usual? What I better at reinforcing the good things he was doing? Was I better at ignoring the little stuff? What about the accommodations and modifications on today's work made it more palatable? Did I smile more? Did I smile less?

And what if it's a medication issue? I have zero control over that. Or maybe the child got through breakfast at home without getting smacked around. Or the bully on the bus was absent.

What if...what if....what if....

We teachers often beat ourselves up trying to figure out how to best help our students. I know that sometimes I do, even though I'm very aware of how idiotic it is to lose sleep over these kinds of things. It's probably a by-product of our strong desire to do what's right for kids.

But I pledge today to shift my worrying and wondering to a more productive path. I will not obsess, just consider. I will not put myself down when things go wrong, but use my expertise, experience, and commitment to kids to strategically plan for doing things better the next time. I will not lose sleep, but pray for wisdom and patience, and leave it at that.